Ötzi the Iceman’s Tattoos May Have Been a Primitive Form of Acupuncture

The oldest preserved human body is that of Otzi, a 5300-year-old “wet mummy” that was found still partially encased in glacial ice in northernmost Italy in 1991. Otzi is far older than the Egyptian and Incan mummies, or the peat bog bodies in Northern Europe, and he holds several other records as well:

Oldest intact, preserved human organs

Oldest known tattoos (> 60 of them)

Oldest evidence of acupuncture

And probably, the oldest known murder cover up

Here’s how it likely went down: It was late spring and Otzi was feeling his age of 45 years. He’d recently had acupuncture treatments to relieve pain at the tattooed sites on his lower back, knees and ankles. He’d eaten birch polypore mushroom to ease his ulcers. Otzi’s rotten teeth hurt, and this morning, he’d swallowed poisonous fern bracken to try to get rid of his whipworms. He’d had a fight in the village in which his hand was injured, and he was fleeing to higher ground. At 10,500′ elevation, Otzi’s pursuers caught up with him and shot him from behind. The arrow to the shoulder was a mortal wound, but his enemies finished him off with a blow to the head. To remove evidence, they extracted their arrow, losing the point in the process. Dragging his body to a gully, they threw him in along with his valuable possessions. After covering him with snow and ice, they left.

Little did the killers know that their brutal act had left the world a TREASURE of information.