Who of us is mature enough for offspring before the offspring themselves arrive? The value of marriage is not that adults produce children but that children produce adults. – Peter De Vries
A two-year-old is like having a blender, but you don’t have a top to it. – Jerry Seinfeld
Hanging out with my two-year-old is basically one big suicide watch. Their mission is to find one way after another of offing themselves – piss in an electric socket, lick a pit bull’s nose…and your job as a parent is to stop it before it happens. – Michael J. Fox