Service
I get confused when I hear the word “Service”.
Like with…
The Internal Revenue ‘Service’
The Postal ‘Service’
The Telephone ‘Service’
The Cable TV ‘Service’
The Civil ‘Service’
Public ‘Service’
Customer ‘Service’
Those are NOT what I thought ‘Service’ meant.
But today, I overheard two farmers talking, and one of them said he had bought a bull to ‘Service’ his cows. Wow!! Suddenly my list made perfect sense!!
Isn’t life great when you understand it. 🙂
Now You Got Lizzards Up North?
(I’m sure the B is missing and they meant to warn of blizzards but let’s have some fun with this…)
After COVID and murder hornets you now have lizzards?
Well, you can come down here if you like.
Just watch out for the sting rays, great white sharks, blue-ringed octopus, box jelly-fish, funnel web and redback spiders, coastal Taipan and inland Taipan, red-bellied black, death adder, Tiger, Eastern brown, Mulga, small eyed and copperhead snakes.
Oh, and let’s not forget the boxing kangaroos and drop bears.
Dang! Nearly forgot to warn you about the swooping magpies too!
No Vacancy
We lived through this in our family. Dessert Stomach it was called. My dinner stomach is full but there is pleny of room in my dessert stomach.
Santa Logs On
Christmas Tip
Observations Of COVID Response Illogics
Me AT GROCERY STORE: Why is there plastic on the payment keypad?
Cashier: To protect people from COVID.
Me: But isn’t everyone touching the plastic keypad the same way they would the regular keypad?
Cashier: No words. Confused look.
Me: Why don’t you pack the grocery bags anymore?
Cashier: Because of COVID to reduce the spread of catching or spreading the virus.
Me: But a shelf packer took it out of a box and put on the shelf, a few customers might of picked it up and put back deciding they don’t want it, I put it in my cart then on the conveyer belt, YOU pick it up to scan it. But putting it in a bag after you scan it is risky?
Cashier: No words, confused look.
Me: AT DRIVE-THRU
Server: Holds a tray out the window with a bag of food for a logical friend to grab.
Me: Why is my bag of food on a tray?
Server: So I don’t touch your food because of COVID.
Me: Didn’t the cook touch my food? Didn’t the person wrapping my food touch it and then touch it again when placing it in my bag? Didn’t you touch the bag and put it on the tray? Didn’t you touch the tray?
Server: No words. Confused look.
Society: If you cough or sneeze do it in your elbow or sleeve. Don’t shake hands or hug anyone or you will spread the virus. To greet people do an elbow tap instead.
Me: Elbow tap? Isn’t that where you tell people to sneeze or cough? into their elbow? Now you want people to tap each other with that elbow. Wouldn’t it be safer to sneeze into your elbow and shake hands like we did before COVID?
Me: AT RESTAURANT:
Hostess: OK, I can seat you at this table right here (4 feet away), but I will need you to wear a mask to the table.
Me: What happens when I get to the table?
Hostess: You can take off the mask.
Me: Then it is safe over there?
Hostess: Yes.
Me: Are those fans blowing above the table? Is that the air-conditioning I feel? Is the air circulating in here?
Hostess: No words. Confused look.
SOCIETY: You are not allowed to stand and drink at the pub you have to sit down.
But at the shopping center, you are not allowed to sit down, all the chairs are roped off.
Who thinks this crap up?
Life is hard for logical people right now. We are being raised without the ability to process and execute logic.
No wonder everyone is depressed and confused. THAT, my friend is how the GOVERNMENT WANTS YOU!! DEPRESSED, CONFUSED and EASY YO MANIPULATE!!
Copied and Pasted from a friend.
Rude Awakening
Lost Roomba
Hate to break it to ya guys…
A Decision Was Made
Don’t know that I would have made the same decision, nevertheless, he made it! Maybe he has a stack of old newspapers at home.