{"id":27006,"date":"2020-03-29T13:09:54","date_gmt":"2020-03-29T02:09:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.tomgrimshaw.com\/tomsblog\/?p=27006"},"modified":"2024-06-26T04:24:51","modified_gmt":"2024-06-25T18:24:51","slug":"piglet-and-pooh-i-just-watch-sticks","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.tomgrimshaw.com\/tomsblog\/?p=27006","title":{"rendered":"Piglet And Pooh – I Just Watch Sticks"},"content":{"rendered":"\r\n
\"Piglet<\/figure>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

“Where are we going Piglet?” asked Pooh.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

“We need to get supplies,” said Piglet. “For the Coronavirus”<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

“Ahh,” said Pooh, nodding in understanding. “Things like bread, milk, cough mixture, tissues and cat litter even though we don’t have a cat?”<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Piglet did a little laugh, and a sort of leap and bit of a cough. “No,” said Piglet. “No, those aren’t the sort of supplies we need at all! What we need are family sized bags of chocolate buttons, massive Toblerone, jelly babies and crunchies and a freezer full of stuffed crust pizzas, and all of the Prosecco that we can possibly carry, so that when we get quarantined we won’t mind it even slightly. THOSE are supplies.”<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

All of a sudden, Pooh thought that the idea of coronavirus didn’t seem quite so bad, and actually, getting quarantined with Piglet and their supplies really didn’t sound such a terrible thing after all. “Oh Piglet,” said Pooh. “I really do think you are a very wise animal.”<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

As they walked along they spotted Eeyore stood by a stream watching the sticks float by\u2026..<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

\u201cHello Eeyore,\u201d Said Pooh, \u201cwe\u2019re off to buy supplies to sit out the quarantine, would you like to come?\u201d<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

\u201cNo thank you.\u201d Said Eeyore \u201cI\u2019m just going to stand here, look at the stream and contemplate the Economic impact of a media induced panic that several companies are projecting folding straight out of Brexit. Also the NHS being brought to its knees by a huge panic, and the social impact of people distrusting others because they look or are associated with China. People are dumb.\u201d<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

\u201cWell that\u2019s sad.\u201d Said Pooh \u201cI much prefer getting shitfaced and eating Pizza.\u201d<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

\u201cThe ironic thing,\u201d Smiled Eeyore, “is that Panic induces the Stress Response, and the first thing the stress response does is switch off the immune system.\u201d<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

\u201cHuh.\u201d Said Pooh, \u201cWhy would the media do that.\u201d<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know.\u201d Said Eeyore \u201cI just watch sticks.”<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Aurthor unknown<\/p>\r\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

“Where are we going Piglet?” asked Pooh. “We need to get supplies,” said Piglet. “For the Coronavirus” “Ahh,” said Pooh, nodding in understanding. “Things like bread, milk, cough mixture, tissues and cat litter even though we don’t have a cat?” Piglet did a little laugh, and a sort of leap and bit of a cough. … <\/p>\n

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